so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
I queefed so loud it echoed.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
You are a booty call, not a friend.
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize