I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
I'm supposed to be maturing, but no instead I'll be shitting my pants in Delaware for my 30th.
Hahahaha nah you won't shit your pants - but you will fully try mushrooms.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
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