Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
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