Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
can u get pink eye on your cock?
you texted me last night and told me you couldn't find the toilet.
That explains the puddle of pee in my closet.
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
