woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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