You screamed, "I am going to fuck this cheeseburger". They all started laughing until you actually started having sex with the cheeseburger.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Reading an example in the GRE study book referencing Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles while wearing TMNT pajamas. *airfist*
omg please tell me you're eating pizza right now too.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Randomize
