is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
Exactly. Because my vagina can't be consoled with words. It requires a thicker form of communication
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
Drunk me is having trouble keeping up with sober me's standards
Randomize
