3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
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