listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
