I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Randomize
