Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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