gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
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