This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
