I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Santa Clause just drove by me on a fire truck. Epic night begins.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
