My roommate and I had a nyquil contest. The nyquil won.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Clearly you need to take sleeping pills and put your phone in the toilet
Randomize
