office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Are my feet made of real feet?
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
