i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
There is no try. Just do it. Yoda said that. Or Nike. I can't remember. whiskey
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
The bouncers found you passed out on the toilet. They tried to move you but you refused and repeatedly shouted that you wanted to go out like Elvis.
Randomize
