i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
He told me I just kept sending him the word sex and dollar signs.
I'm writing my will in case I die this week, it'll be saved on my computer under: little 500 death scenario
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize
