I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I got pull-out-my-nuvaring-drunk last night.
Randomize
