drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
it feels like theres a golf ball between my legs. the sex was totally worth it tho.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
im trying to find a facebook picture of him that doesnt make me regret sleeping with him. its not working
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Randomize
