so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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