Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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