DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
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