Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
we were on a sandy mattress. i was wearing a sweatshirt with a poodle on it and eating a whopper jr. i wouldn't have fucked me either.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
