Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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