He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
there's something wrong with the internet when a search for "barney the dinosaur violence" comes up with nothing
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Her father's a cardiologist, her mom's a lawyer...she just went from a 5 to a 10 real quick.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
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