im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
The worst thing about having a parent with a prius is that they can walk in on you without any warning
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
She made me walk a straight line to prove i was sober enough to help carry you to the car
Knowing you it was perfect out of spite. Like. A line straighter than YOU
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
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