I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
you threw up in the oven last night. i found that out after i preheated it to cook a pizza.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Well i would have gone to the bar but Satan decided to hold his rituals in my uterus.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
Randomize
