Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
Nothing says walk of shame better than a onesie and a 12 pack of corona..
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
