one two three fourrrrnication!
i guess that's what happens when you find your girlfriend at the zoo
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
If you're staying here tonight, you need to promise me you won't make another bonfire in the lounge room. My girl is still pissed about that.
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I asked him if he wanted a pillow, and he replied "No. Batman never had pillows."
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
Randomize
