Duck Duck Cougar?
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
I'm naming my child veloci raptor. And you can be a part of its life if you want. But that's its name. Cause i have the vagina.
the day after is always just damage control
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Welcome to your 30’s, where every one night stand is most likely with someone’s father
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
Randomize
