Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
I think I pulled a muscle in my tongue.
sorry? thank you? I love you?
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Randomize
