she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
