I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Randomize
