oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Randomize