it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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