: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Just saw a girl that looks like Michelle Obama and Im strangely aroused by her. Does that make me a democrat?
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Randomize
