I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
i forgot to brush my teeth before I went over so i went to the bathroom and started eating his toothpaste. we're still in the early stages of fuckdom
Is Oprah even human
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
