Baby momma caught me doing baby daddy in reverse cowgirl. She kicked me out and i have no clothes, come get me.
I hope you walked the shit out of that shame.
I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I have so much shit FLYING through my head. They're all in magic carpets and everything
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
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