Just had to reach into my sister's bag and shut off her vibrator so my parents wouldn't hear it. I am the world's greatest brother.
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
i was out of cigarettes so i took the butts out of the ashtray, emptied them out, and proceeded to roll one big Frankenstein cigarette.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
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