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38 yer olds are good kisserssss
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
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