What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
3 2 1 whiskey
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
