She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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