I am in a vortex of obligation.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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