Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
My favorite part of you downing a fifth of fireball in my apartment by yourself is the shot glass in the sink. It's like you attempted moderation and were just like "Fuck this."
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
