i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Taking Gomer to the ER. He tore something trying to stretch his nutsack enough to put his balls in his own ass. I need new friends.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Buffalo PD walked in my bedroom this morning at 7 am. Was still blackout drunk, fully dressed, Steak Out wrapper on the floor, parking meter on the floor of the bar room. 'Both of your doors were wide open, wanted to make sure no one was robbing you.' Then I made a pass at her.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
