It's like God shit irony all over that family
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Randomize
