I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
You made out with two different species that night
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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