So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Seeing someone hit Themselves in the balls with someone else's hand is amazing. I love being the sober one
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize
