MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
This tiny cat is tiny breathing with her tiny lungs and im having a tiny freak out. Like those lungs have to be super tiny.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
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